Ministry frontman Al Jourgensen seems like the type of dude that could fill just about any amount of time you give him with ridiculously colorful stories that are likely varying degrees of inappropriate. Jourgensen recently sat down with Metal Hammer and told a few of these stories, one of which was about the time Nine Inch Nails frontman Trent Reznor was Ministry's roadie.
Unfortunately for Reznor, this time frame involves being hit with firecrackers whilst in his bunk, one of which set him on fire. They're cool now though, so it's fine apparently.
We started out with throwing fire crackers in his bunk on the tourbus. He was kind of grumpy about it, but he didn’t freak out. Then I threw an M-80 [firework] in there and he went flying out of there half on fire. Later I roofied him when we were in the studio and shaved his head while he was passed out. I was actually gonna shave his eyebrows off as well, but he came to after I had only finished one eyebrow. He was kinda mad about that but I have nothing but good things to say about Trent.
They were drinking my beer and told me to fuck off, so I dropped my trousers, shoved the vegetables from the deli tray up my ass and chased them around trying to rub my ass carrots on them. They freaked out and left. When Ministry was on Lollapalooza, Ice Cube started drinking my fuckin’ beer before we got offstage and then bitched about the kind of beer we had. So I stripped naked and started rubbing my cock on him, which he didn’t like. I thought his bodyguard was gonna beat my ass, but he was laughing so hard. It was the funniest thing he had ever seen.
Oh, and we're not sure if anyone told Al that you're allowed to masturbate legally. It seems like he might think smoking weed and masturbation are both illegal? On the topic of porn and masturbation, Al says "I love the web. Masturbation and marijuana should both be legal. That’s all I have to say."
So there you have it, ladies and gentlemen. Al Jourgensen is out of his mind, but the man can clearly still write a riff.