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Ask Me...I'm Right

ASK ME I'M RIGHT: Greg answers questions about jobs, evolution and other deep thoughts

Ask Me...I'm Right

Hey, it's me G. Dubs, low end of the prog rock tri the Red Chord. You asked advice/stupid questions about my band and I gave it/answered them. Here's some advice, go get Prey for Eyes July 24th. Yeah!

Hio Greg,
Yeah, what's your theory on "evolution", do you think life exists on other planets besides earth? If so, what "source" do we derive from??

Greg's response:
You're making my brain hurt Brandon. Well, the scientists say that we come from apes. I have a tail bone, I'll buy it. The Christians say we come from a man who was made out of clay and a lady who was made from his rib. OK….. I have ribs, I guess I'll buy that. Bottom line, we're here. You and I are alive right now and who cares where we came from. Let's stop thinking about it and enjoy right now. Put on a Burt Bacharach CD, dim the lights and sing aloud until your neighbors complain!!!

PS- We derive from Rock N' Roll.

I'm 15 and I play in a weird metal/punk/ska/classical/prog band.  But besides that I can't find a job.  Where do I go to find a job at the young age I am?  Also when are you anouncing the results for that contest at Interpunk?

Greg's response:
You are genre defining. Contest schmontest. I'm the bass player, they don't tell me a damn thing. About the job. At fifteen I was onto my third job. I was a stock boy at the now defunct Caldors here in Massachusetts and also, when summer time hit I was mowing lawns. Make your Mom and Pops drive you around to stores in the area. All stores need little teens they can yell at and push around and they'll do just that. Don't worry about it though, it'll help build character and eventually you'll move onto bigger ands better things and years later you can visit the store and laugh at those who still work there. I guarantee you they'll still be there. Good luck,

Why the hell isn't Aeon playing when you come back to Florida with Cannibal Corpse? THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT. WHAT THE HELL IS YOUR ISSUE, MAAAANNNN????

On a less accusitory note, did my pinky finger really taste like chicken when it proceeded to get planted in your throat at your show here (Backbooth on the 10th)?
Should I apply gravy when you come back?
And what the hell happened to everyone's mustache?

Sincerely (and awkwardly) yours,

Awkward, huh, you don't say. I remember you. You're the one who gave the horns as I head banged which led to me chewing on your finger. Yes, it did taste like chicken and no, do not apply gravy next time. You can, however, take me out to Tijuana Flats instead. We only do mustaches on certain tours and some of us, the less manly members, don't do them at all.
PS- I personally told Aeon not to play those shows because I knew it would piss you off. Sucka!!!

hey greg, how's life?
                Unfortunately mine is a bit troubled. I've played guitar for nearly 5 years now and needless to say, im amazing. But as i  grew and my musical interests have matured, i found myself enjoying those thumpin' lines coming out of Bootsy, Vic Wooton, Flea, and Les Claypool and others that clearly understand the concecpt behind grooving. So i didnt do any drugs for awhile and managed to buy a P bass for 80 buks and given my prior experience with the guitar, i learned to play it no problem. Unfortunately though, the ability to play really fast has kind of restricted me to only being able to jam, well, really fast and i don't feel that i've been able to really play it in its traditional and effective role. And after seeing you play live, it was clear that you are pretty knowledgable of all things groovy. So what kind of practice regeem could i focus my life around to jam so effortlessly? Am i hopeless? What allows you to do this? Any help would be greatly apprecciated.
                        Bass noob,


By the sounds of it you don't need any ones help. I mean you're an amazing guitar player and you easily mastered the bass in a short span of time. Why not conquer drums or the sousaphone? My practice regime consists of sleeping, eating ice cream and listening to Millie Jackson's "Caught Up". I never pick up my instrument until I've followed these steps and know that the funk is flowing inside of me. You gots ta feel it Tom. No book or drug will teach you that. To answer your first question, my life's pretty all right.


Got a life issue and can't find that suicide hotline number? Need some tips on how to be an awesome bassist? Then submit your questions to Greg Weeks by e-mailing [email protected]

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