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ASK ME, I'M RIGHT: Goodness Gracious…

I have a dilemma that might sound kind of strange to you but I just don't know where else to turn.
I play in a band called Bad Acid Trip and we just finished the Ozzfest tour, maybe you heard of us?Well the playing in those extreme temperatures rendered my balls very chaffed at the end of eachshow. But that's not the problem only the cause of a more burdening issue. So what happened was,I came home from Ozzfest and shaved my balls, now that the hair is growing back I have this onepesky hair that decided to grow the wrong way, creating this sort of herpetic looking sore that just won'tpop and hurts like a son of bitch. Worst thing is, when I go see my girl next week she's not going to believethat I'm not some kind of disease ridden,manwhore,touring musician. I know you know what I mean……….What should I do?

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Thanks for your time,
Jose Perez
Bad Acid TripGreg's response:

Jose,
To prevent these types of problems I bring medicated gold bond on tour with me. Usually in the morning I throw some in my shoes and on my frontal hello dangley area. This prevents the brutal tour chafe. As for your current problem, soak your buddy in warm water and bring that bad boy to a head, no pun intended. Explain to your lady what happened and hopefully she'll believe you. I was also on Ozzfest this summer and the name Bad Acid Trip rings a bell. You wouldn't have been the band that went over the audiences  head but had almost the entire second stage watching you everyday would you have? I think I saw you guys at catering once eating a baby,
-Greg

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