Jessicka Addams of riot grrrl band Jack off Jill has accused her ex-boyfriend Jeordie White, a.k.a. Twiggy Ramirez, bassist of Marilyn Manson of abusing her and raping her when they were in a relationship 20 years ago.
Addams spoke out on her Facebook saying that at the time, she was encouraged by her label to stay quiet out of fear of blacklisting: “In 1997, I was warned by my band’s record company that if I revealed my story publically, there would be a very good chance that my band Jack Off Jill would be black balled by concert promoters, radio programmers, and other bands and their managers. Jack Off Jill was also warned of running the risk of losing our coveted record deal (which they gave us!!,) as they were certain no one would ever take a rape victim in this male dominated music business seriously, nevermind a ferocious, disenfranchised, outspoken overweight front woman such as myself! The label blatantly feared the big machine behind Marilyn Manson would use their power to destroy not only Jack Off Jill, but my name, Jessicka, as well. The pressure and guilt of the inevitable repercussions of my rape story affecting my band’s livelihood, happiness and success kept me silent for years.”
Addams said she met White when she was 18 and "was not experienced in healthy relationships, and up until meeting him I assumed all relationships were that women’s role was to act subservient." In her statement, which you can read in full below, she outlines multiple times White would act abusive out of jealousy, and then began being physically abusive:
The physical abuse did not start until a few months later when Jeordie took a cage full of our pet white mice and dumped them into my mother's car that I was borrowing at the time. That is the first day I can remember him hitting me over me over and over as the mice scattered. He later apologized profusely and said it would never happen again.
The abuse didn't stop, and eventually, Addams claims, White raped her:
Trent Reznor was in South Florida around this time and we all went out on night. Trent and I struck up a conversation and Jeordie became so enraged he demanded we leave immediately. He began driving my car erratically on the highway, all the while punching me the chest several times,knocking the air out of my lungs. He proceeded to rip off the rear view mirror and threw it out the open window. Throughout the madness, this was a rather poignant moment. He just couldn’t bear to face himself in that mirror. So he proceeded to destroy it. Perhaps after everything he had done to somebody he claimed he loved was the sick reason he needed to become somebody else.
I feared for my life that night. I stayed awake while he slept. At this point I wanted to leave him, but at this time most of my friends who had not moved away were also too enmeshed in the Manson camp to find a way to do the right thing and stand up for me. No one was comfortable speaking about it, let alone thinking of exposing to the world the horror I was dealing with.
During a short break on tour opening for Nine Inch Nails,
Jeordie returned home to what was just Pete's apartment, as I was now staying with friends. I knew at that point that Jeordie had not been faithful on tour, including being with women whom I to this day respect and considered my musical contemporaries. All this led to an argument I never saw coming. He forced me on to the floor with his hand around my neck. I said NO. I said NO. I said it so loud enough, that Pete came rushing in from the other room to get him off of me. But I had been raped. I had been raped by somebody I thought I loved. That night I slept in Pete's bed and cried myself to sleep. Neither of us discussed it until years later as we both had our own shame about not reporting it.
It's never easy to tell the truth when you know how much backlash you'll receive.
You can read her entire post in full below. Consequences of Sound reports that Marilyn Manson released a statement, saying:
“I knew Jessicka and Jeordie had a romantic relationship many years ago and I considered and still consider Jessicka to be a friend. I knew nothing about these allegations until very recently and am saddened by Jessicka’s obvious distress.”
