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This Restaurant's List Of Banned Music Includes Death Metal Bands That Sell Skate Decks, All CHRIS BARNES & More

No post-Heartwork Carcass, no Nirvana unless your parents are divorced, etc.

Banned

If you're headed to the Baldwin Street Grille in Madison, WI, you better watch what you play. Well, unless you want to piss off the grille's sous-chef Paul Wildhoney.

According to Metal Hammer, the Baldwin Street Grille's list of banned music was mostly a joke to poke fun at metal gatekeeping. Wildhoney said he posted the photo of the list online to get a few laughs, only to see it completely and totally blow up. the list includes overarching bans on bands like Five Finger Death Punch and Type O Negative, to super specific ones like "no Meshuggah, Gojira, Gatecreeper, or any other new commercial death metal band that sells skateboard decks."

Check out the full list below, transcribed since the original is a little difficult to make out.

  • No Weezer
  • No Pantera
  • No Darkthrone/Dark Funeral/1349
  • No Lacuna Coil (Other than the first three)
  • No Daft Punk
  • No Gorillaz
  • No albums involving Chris Barnes
  • No Obituary
  • No Sublime
  • No Red Hot Chili Peppers
  • No Type O Negative
  • No Metallica
  • No Five Finger Death Punch
  • No pizza thrash of any kind
  • Yes, Anthrax is pizza thrash
  • Absolutely no Beatles
  • No Meshuggah, Gojira, Gatecreeper, or any other new commercial death metal band that sells skateboard decks
  • No Deafheaven, just listen to Alcest instead FFS
  • No Kenny G (his son's projects are fair game tho)
  • No Malevolent Creation
  • No Arghoslent or Grand Belial's Key
  • For real tho, no Weezer or Pantera. Can't say this enough
  • No Nirvana unless your parents are divorced
  • No Foo Fighters either
  • No Cattle Decapitation
  • No Machine Gun Kelly, regardless of which genre it is
  • No Slowdive, find better shoegaze
  • No Behemoth
  • No Jinjer
  • No Slipknot
  • No white trash slam
  • No Carcass post-Heartwork
  • No Batushka of any kind
  • No musicals
  • No folk punk
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