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CD Review: IPSISSIMUS The Way of Descent

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Ipsissimus are some funny dudes. Last Saturday at a show in Connecticut, bassist and lead vocalist Tichondrius stated proudly:

We're gonna play something off our demo because we like to play it. Some of you have it, some of you don't, we don't give a fuck. I'm wearing a Metallica shirt because they used to rule. We used to rule and then we got signed to Metal Blade and now we suck. We sold out and you're all fucking posers so hop on the sellout train!

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As well as hopping on the sellout train, I'll be peppering more gems like this throughout the review for your enjoyment.

About 2 years ago, Ipsissimus were a small but respected black metal band from he most evil place on Earth… New Haven, Connecticut. But after some local exposure and some help from legendary drummer Richard Christy (Death, Iced Earth) Ipsissimus were signed to Metal Blade Records. The Way of Descent is set to be released tomorrow (May 24th) and is sure to impress and captivate black metal fans everywhere it spreads.

This next song is dedicated to my dick

The six-song LP contains three songs from their earlier EP, The Three Secrets of Fantima and three newly recorded pieces never before featured on previous demos. Within the album you can hear a broad variety of styles such as heavy metal, sludge and doom woven into a raw, yet atmospheric vomit-stained tapestry.

Leave it to some dumbfuck Christian in California to tell us when the world's gonna end. I was in a lawnchair in my front yard at 5:45 jerking off and drinking a margarita. 6 o'clock came around and I didn't cum and I didn't get to see the rapture… eat a dick

Although Ipsissimus will most likely satisfy black metal elitists, the band possesses a more accessible sound which more casual black metal fans will be drawn to as well. Similar to Nachtmystium and Watain, the nature of Ipsissimus' music could act as a stepping stone for those drifting towards a mixture of "pure" black metal and more modern styles.

We're Ipsissimus and we're gonna show you how to use your cocks, pussies, asses, mouths, AND your god damn hands!

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Bottom line, The Way of Descent is worth listening to no matter what your preferred style of the devil's music is. Check out Ipsissimus' Mypace page here.


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