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New Video Tries To Prove James Hetfield & METALLICA Are Part of The Illuminati, Fails

Posted by on June 12, 2017 at 4:02 pm

Who doesn't love a good conspiracy theory? In my teen years, I was obsessed with conspiracies that Kurt Cobain didn't actually kill himself and instead was murdered. I thought, for sure, that Courtney Love did it. Until I grew up and realized none of these conspiracies have much evidence.

But this video right here, this is a bad conspiracy theory. Why? Because the narrator fails to prove his point or make his point at all. The video, titled, "James Hetfield Strange Behavior During Interview Regarding Chris Cornell" tries to imply that Hetfield doesn't feel any real emotions towards Cornell's death, which the narrator believes was staged and Hetfield is in on the staging, AND HE HAS PROOF! What proof? Well, here are some cliff notes.

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  • The narrator mistakes Hetfield's nervous laughter for sincere laughter. "Why is he laughing about Cornell's death?"
  • The narrator points out the "33" on Hetfield's shirt, and how it's tied to the Illuminati because 33 is "the devil's number" as mentioned in Revelation 12:3-9
  • James Hetfield allegedly making the Free Mason symbol with his hands.

    A photo of James Hetfield folding his hands means its Hetfield making the Masonic sign. (Promo photo pictured)

  • Narrator says he believes that Cornell's death is a hoax "like David Bowie's." Narrator points out that photos of Cornell spreading his arms is mocking Christ.
  • Another photo of Cornell shows him behind a pyramid, so obviously – ILLUMINATI!
  • Narrator then moves to the Ride the Lightning cover, saying that lightning is referencing Satan, so the band is "riding with Satan himself."
  • Photos of Lars kissing his band members proves that the band is actively participating in "homosexual acts that go against the Bible. It doesn't mean they are per-say homosexual, they are just going against the Bible," adding "It's definitely not okay," saying Metallica are doing this to convince the population that homosexuality is normal.
  • The narrator is grossed out about old photos of Dave Mustaine and James Hetfield touching tongues and bathing together. (timestamp for you pervs)
  • "This is about social programming. Millions of millions of fans see this." I guess this would make Metallica fans go gay?
  • Narrator notes that Metallica having long hair is a mockery of the Bible.
  • Narrator mocks photos from 30 years ago of "born against Christian" Dave Mustaine wearing a Venom shirt, promoting Baphomet.
  • Narrator mocks Lars and James for taking a photo with Ricky Martin, noting Lars has a Ricky Martin pass so that means they went out of their way to see a Ricky Martin show. No, it means Ricky Martin has his own security at a big festival where both bands played and they wanted to meet, so Lars got a special pass. Timestamp.
  • Narrator is fixated on photos of Lars and Kirk taking silly photos kissing and touching, calling it "a bit much" and that "it says a lot." What does it say?

Ultimately, I don't understand how the hell these assumptions "expose" that Metallica is a part of the freemasons and the Illuminati. What it did expose was this idiot narrator is a homophobe or perhaps a closeted homosexual who is confused about his feelings of arousal when seeing photos of a very straight and comfortable-with-his-sexuality Lars Ulrich fooling around with his friends.

But we did have a good laugh, so for that, I thank you. Not surprisingly, this guy still believes Kurt Cobain's death was a hoax.

[Thanks for the tip, James S.]

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